01 December 2005

The bomb...

I dropped the bomb on my supervisor yesterday. I told him that I need to get out. I explained the situation and whatI have been dealing with and how I can no longer continue doing what I have been doing, and--strangely enough--he has become somewhat hospitable...almost human. I guess the 79R thing is all an act. I guess they learn all about how to treat career soldiers like dirt at the station commander's course. I guess at this point, I really don't care any more. Now the real fun begins, the job hunt. I guess it's a good thing that I have a a fairly marketable skill. I am both excited and apprehensive about my impending civilianhood. I know that this will be tough for a while, but I also know that this is what is needed for me and my family. I don't want my family to suffer any more, particularly my wife. I don't want her antidepressant prescription to escalate any further. I don't want my son to cry because daddy has to go to work anymore; I want him to be proud of me again. Last night he told me it would be OK if daddy was not a soldier anymore, as long as daddy has more time to spend with him. He also told me that he wants to be a soldier like his daddy when he grows up. I don't know if you believe in God or not, but I do because I see the reflection of an awesome creator in the face of my beautiful little son. I will keep you posted on my job hunt progress.

29 November 2005

The Process...

Dear Readers,
Here's an update. I have spoken with my wife and she told me that her doctor told her that we have to separate from the Army in order to facilitate her healing. She told me point blank that if I stay in the Army she will take our child and live with her mother until I ETS. My wife and I are very close, and she loves me, but she is losing her mind to severe depression. She wants to be with me, but not at the cost of her mental and emotional health. We are going to see her doctors tomorrow and the next day, and she tells me that the purpose is for them to corroborate what she has told me. If things are as serious as she says, I won't have any choice but to apply for a hardship discharge. I am not going to separate from my family simply so I can continue soldiering. My family is what gives me the strength to do so in the first place. I define who I am by my family. I have not been sleeping without chemical help these last two months or so, I have quit going to the gym, and I have really begun not caring whether or not I put anyone in the Army. Why? Because I am not only getting severe stress from the job, but from home as well. I don't have the energy to handle both anymore. Hell, I think I need to start talking to a chaplain or something. We need a drastic change or I fear my family will fall apart. If it comes to a choice between the Army or my family, I will choose my family every time.

20 November 2005

The Towel...

Well, dear fans. The time has come for me to do one of two things, throw down the gauntlet, or throw in the towel. Should I choose to do the former, I think I will get put out of the Army with a "Big Chicken Dinner", thus rendering myself unemployable. This leaves the latter as my only option. My family is falling apart. My poor wife is averaging three hours of sleep per night, and my son is going stir crazy because my wife doesn't have the energy to contend with a wild four-year old. Her doctor has already told her what the source of her stress is, my "job". He told her point blank that in order for her to normalize, I need to be doing something else. He suggested that military life is not good for my wife. I suppose this puts me at somewhat of an impasse. I refuse to destroy my family integrity simply so that I can live the life I would prefer. I love being a soldier, but I love my family more. I choose the towel...

11 November 2005

Hell

This has now moved beyond purgatory and into the realm of hell. I now am beginning to wonder if it is worth it any more. I enjoy being a soldier. I enjoy my job. I do not enjoy this recruiting bit. My boss and 1st sergeant keep telling me that I have to change my attitude, that if I would just change my perspective, this wouldn't be so bad.

Allow for me to relay a small story for you as to why I am unable to change my perspective. I have been on vacation for the last week or so--I NEEDED a break. (I sometimes think I am losing my mind. ) I haven't been able to find anyone to join the Army thismonth, so my boss calls me and teels me that he wants to know if I want to work tomorrow. I tell him "not really" because, quite frankly, I am not looking forward to going to work on monday, so why would I want to work two days sooner? He then begins to browbeat me about why I should be trying to scrape someone up on this last day of the month, I should be doing all I can to find someone to send down to join on monday so I can "get off a (dough)nut." He procedes to tell me, in so many words, what a horrendous POS I am and how I should feel awful--not because I won't be working tomorrow, but because I don't want to work tomorrow. What is this, the thought police? I tell him that the 70+ hours a week we already work should be sufficiently "going the extra mile". He then launches into a tirade about how he works twice as many hours as we do, and he doesn't complain. Someone once told me that you don't use wrong to excuse wrong, I think this fits the case. Truthfully, I feel sorry for the guy, but he really doesn't need to take it out on us.

I hope I can survive this, but somehow I think I need to start fishing for a good civilian job. Kind of ironic, given that the whole purpose of this organization is to find people to join the Army, they seem to have no problem sacrificing one of us in the name of that "mission".

08 November 2005

What seems to be the problem?

I am having a difficult month this month. It seems that I won't be putting anyone in the Army this month, or as my superiors (meaning those above me in rank or position) would say, I "haven't pulled/my/load.", that I am"hurting the Army". I guess I am just not cut out for this type of work. I mean, I suppose it's difficult to get hyped about a job that has caused my wife to begin taking antidepressants, maybe that's why I am not "successful". Maybe it's that my child, who used to be proud when daddy went to work ("Daddy, are you a sojer? I wanna be a sojer too."), now cries when daddy puts on his uniform. I mean, if I didn't have the drain of my family, I would have more energy to devote to the sales enterprise...I mean recruiting. Besides, it's better than being in Iraq, right? At least I get to see them every night...for a half hour before they go to sleep. PLEASE! That's what I joined to do. When my family knows I am going to be gone for a fixed amount of time--six months, a year--it's a much less emotionally draining endeavor than having me as an intermittant spectre. If I were in Iraq, at least my family would know that I did not wake up every morning and curse the day. I would at least be doing a job I was comfortable with, a job I am good at, a job I know.

I am sorry, USAREC, I can't pretend to be hyped and motivated about this job. I can't pretend that I like working 70-75 hrs per week. I can't pretend that inordinate and constant pressure helps in a job where 90% of that factors involved are beyond my control. I can't pretend that I don't take it personally when some ignorant kid hangs up on me, or tells me to f-off, or tells me that we "don't need" a military. I can't pretend that it doesn't grate on my nerves when some stupid parent tells me that their snotty kid, who barely cut 950 on the SAT, is too good for the Army. I am not the right man for this job.

25 October 2005

Been Busy

Well, as much as I would like to say that I have been busy putting people in the Army and thus making my life easier, I cannot. Mostly I have been overwhelmed with all of the nattering ancillary tasks that are the part and parcel of recruiting. Truthfully, it often feels as though our biggest problem is all of these "associated" tasks: filling out the planning guide, school folders and LRLs, not to mention ARISS. If we didn't pencil-whip this stuff, we'd never be caught up. As it is, we now waste several hours per day ensuring that this stuff is straight, so that if such-and-such occurs or so-and-so decides to drop by for a visit, your books are at least in order. Though, under careful examination, one might conclude that these other tasks--in fact--contribute to our difficulty putting people in the Army. Consider this scenario: a recruiter has to catch up with his books because some big wig is coming for a visit. He also has some hot leads, but he knows he will have to spend some time with these leads to make them pay off. What do you think he would do? He'd spend the time fixing the books so that he can avoid an ass-chewing. That's what soldiers do, particularly in this business where time is sooo valyooahbull. Ipso, ergo, he might have missed out on a contract or two...but at least he avoided an ass-chewing.

11 October 2005

Back to work...

You know, I had thought about it. I hope my fellow non-commissioned officers reading this don't think that I am a dirtbag. I am the same person now that I was three years ago. I have always been prone to point out things that I thought were wrong, but I have always offered solutions. I've always been the "squeaky wheel", but I've always offered my own "grease". Anyway, this site is not supposed to be an indictment of me, but of recruiting. I just wanted my audience to know who they were dealing with. Those who know me best would say, and my father is the greatest example, that the Army has finally given me "something to really complain about." When I return to the Army, I will be the same person I was when I left...only less inclined to sweat the small stuff. I am and will continue to be a hard charger who gets it done.

For what it's worth, here is my suggestion for the Army to improve recruiting in NY. #1. They need to hire PROFESSIONAL telemarketers to make these appointments. A professional does not need to be taught how to "sell", only what the product they are selling has to offer to their market. That way if someone's not successful, they can be fired. #2. Use field recruiters to conduct appointments and focus on generating walk-ins (as they say, there is no such thing as a "walk-in"). Then field recruiters could use their time between appointments to conduct referral prospecting and area canvassing (you know, setting up standees with Army info to get people to call and walk in; i.e. generate interest) #3. Reduce the amount of "training" foisted upon field recruiters. As was previously mentioned, a lot of emphasis is put upon time management, so why do the powers that be see the need to suck up so much of our time with "training" (although some of this "training" is useful, most of it focuses on successful recruiters gloating about their successes and denigrating those of us who are not) and miscellaneous other trips to "the flagpole" for this, that, and the other. #4. Send fewer field recruiters to NY. This would save the Army copious amounts of money in BAH (housing money), special duty pay, COLA (cost of living diff.), not to mention moving expenses, and TDY to and from Ft. Jackson for recruiter school...plus the actual cost of the school itself.

With a telemarketing "center" located perhaps on Ft. Hamilton made up of civilian contractors, the Army would need 10%-20% fewer recruiters in the NY area. Civilians would not have to be sent to recruiter school, they could be given a few weeks of training right there at Hamilton, then cut loose on the phones to do their thing. No need for DOD to carry medical or dental, or housing, etc. See where I am going? Those soldiers left would only have to conduct appointments and get known in their communities. This would save the Army enormous amounts of money, and would result in far fewer NCOs burnt out from recruiting. It makes no sense when we are war, to pull seasoned veterans from the line. Now, not only do they have to fill the vacancies normally incurred by the Army, they have to fill their own seat as well. Since coming to recruiting, I have met more NCOs who intend to fulfill their term of enlistment, then separate from the service. Without exception, these NCOs I have spoken to have stated that they had planned on reenlisting until they arrived in NY for recruiting. With this in mind, it seems as though the NY recruiting sytem or mentality--whatever you label it--contravenes the Army's recruiting/retention goals.